You’re invited to our wedding – if you pay for your Food / Drinks

We are living in tough financial times and many couples are resorting to some very creative or shall we say cheap ways of paying for their weddings.

From asking for money instead of gifts to getting guests to pay for their own food; nothing is too taboo.

We look at some of the cost cutting measures couples have adopted for the weddings:

Getting the wedding party to pay for their outfits


This has become the norm in many weddings. The groomsmen and the bridesmaids are expected to pay their outfits and shoes and in some cases they even cover their own transport costs. – This sometimes means paying for two outfits (traditional and modern) that you will never wear again.

Money instead of gifts


Out the fear of being stuck with ten blenders and twenty dinner sets couples are opting for money instead of gifts for their weddings.

Wedding invitations are sent out with little messages like these at the bottom:

“Your presence at our wedding is all that we wish for. However, if you want to give a gift, we will be grateful for a small cash donation towards our new future/house renovations/honeymoon/etc.”

Open bar


This is one of the most common ways of saving on costs. Instead of letting guests drink the whole night on your tab, you get them to pay for their own drinks. This is normally limited to alcoholic drinks

Barter trade


If celebs can get stuff for free why can’t you? Getting your big day sponsored by a company or publication is another growing trend.

‘Most pretend to have a blog of some sort that they promise to plug your products on. But some are totally brazen and just ask for free holidays or clothes, without even pretence that they’re offering anything in return,’ a PR person for a health and beauty brand told the DailyMail.

Paying for your own food


Of all the weird cost cutting measures we’ve heard of, this one takes the trophy. Why invite guests to your wedding then expect them to pay for the food?

According to the, the new trend is to ask guests to cover the costs of their meal and a share of the entertainment. Bank details are often printed at the bottom of the invitation so you can pay for the meal in advance.

Would you go to such a wedding? Give us your thoughts on the different cost cutting measures.


  1. Advice no.2 is a killer!


    28 January 2015 • 10:23 am •
  2. in black culture, we would say “wa gapelletsa”, the bridal party paying for their own outfits, has been done for years, but paying for my own food that is just not on, what will it be if the venue is at home, “bring a dish??????”


    28 January 2015 • 10:50 am •
    • Kwakwkawkawkwkakwkwkkwakwwkkaw. Kgapeletso at its best


      4 February 2015 • 9:43 am •
  3. Instead of people paying for their own food its better to do a very small wedding and invite only40 people. Phela a wedding is a wedding bcos of food.


    28 January 2015 • 11:43 am •
  4. Some people tend to get married in their late 20’s or 30’s and by that time already have fully furnished homes and really do not need start up items for newly weds. Is it bad to say on the invite vouchers from @Home, Boardmans etc would be appreciated? Because if one says no gifts only your presence…it’ll come across as if you’re pompous or arrogant? I received an invitation like that where the couple said their home is already furnished if you would like to buy something gift vouchers would be appreciated and they named the list of shops. Some people took offence. I think gift vouchers are way better than giving money. Giving money leaves a bad taste. Your thoughts?


    28 January 2015 • 12:50 pm •
  5. Paying for your own food and entertainment takes the cake that’s just wrong on so many levels!!! I doubt we black people would attend such a wedding. The bar isssue I understand, people ba abuse dilo if they hear that it’s for free they order alcohol that is way too expensive, what they would never buy with their own money. Ba senya nje!


    28 January 2015 • 12:55 pm •
  6. Ai u see dis modern ways of doing things is utter taboo.I mean ge chelete e se teng ga e teng eyang ko Commisioner lo signer se salang le for gifts and paying for my own food is just nonsense. with regards to da drinks that 1 is very common even if ga ba re BOB, ppl just bring thier own drinks and as a host you just give what you have even le ko di partying.Bridal party outfits dat black ppl do, makgowa ke bona o ka reng bana le nonsense nyana.I think couples and bridal parties should somehow always discuss attire with the party and not just impose them.

    that’s my 2cents worth of advice.


    28 January 2015 • 2:06 pm •
  7. One cannot expect the people who have graced his/her wedding with their presence to bring their own food along, it sounds weird….


    29 January 2015 • 10:31 am •
  8. iyoo petrol ya ka go tla koo


    30 January 2015 • 8:59 am •

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